And, for the most part, the online dating adventure has been exactly that. But, there have been a few interactions that have gone really really bad. As in “you fat bitch” and one that I reported to a friend of mine (who is a San Jose PD detective) that basically said I would be better off dead. Now, I am certain that this sort of thing happens to women of all sizes and shapes. Well, “you fat bitch” probably only happens to fat women. You can be a size 2 and get plenty of hate mail and comments. There are way too many amazing, uplifting people in the world to spend your days with those ass hats. And, if you find yourself being harassed online via email or message or texts, just keep replying with the words ” Please stop emailing me.” Or “Please stop texting me.” Be clear. And, when you get someone who is being rude via text or your cell phone – do NOT delete their telephone number from your phone.It is so fascinating how one moment someone is basically begging me to go on a date with them and then the next minute, after I politely turn them down, that it turns so ugly. (“Eat a cheeseburger” memes come to mind.) When you are fat woman online, you get fun stuff like this: (And, I do believe in full disclosure. Just change the name in your contact to “Dick head. He made threats to me” or something like that so you have their telephone number and you NEVER mistakenly answer their call.Something happened via email yesterday morning that made me sort of snap! Total unconditional love and everyone should be loved as well as I have been loved. Could we maybe meet first before you start telling me all about your junk. How about we shake hands once or twice before we start talking about “bumping uglies.” I could go on and on. But, like I said, 95% of my experiences have been great.
I persuaded myself through cliches, “It’s a numbers game. Every lid has a teapot.” And with that 50 Fat Dates was born.
Also, because plus size dating is a taboo, because so many big girls (including me) have been told they’re ‘too fat to date,’ because I wanted to find out what guys really think about dating plus size women and because I needed to put myself out there! Although based on the response I’m sure that would have been possible. I tried online dating, meetups, introductions, dating events, big girl night clubs, conferences, weddings, and networking mixers.
So all of my online profiles include some verbiage that I am NOT looking to hook up or for a booty call. Just a few tips from my friend who deals with this kind of bullying and threats a lot.
And, I also say I am a very sassy, voluptuous woman and even use the word BBW and spell out “big beautiful woman.”) “Wanna fuck?
Six years ago, I couldn’t get a real date to save my life.